Not A Poem, Thoughts Of Mine Poem by Naiad Childe Heiseiryu

I am on a journey of self searching, finding what's within me
Why my heart is still beating?
When i thought it's already numb and can't feel anything
Love bloomed in no time, Excitement, Happiness all in one
Everything's like a Dream, I let myself be drown
Now it's turning to Illusion, left is pain and depression
I count hours, days, nights, Loneliness gnaws my heart...

Love's breathing, lighting a memory
Images flash back on my mind
How it felt when we were talking
We discussed about skies, stars and we in between
Oh, Memories like a candle sending warm to my heart
Love seemed I cannot live without...
And yet, as days gone by without your presence
I can't help this Insecurities eating my heart
Negativity is somewhat a friend
And the Convincer in my head telling it's a waste
Vision of Love darkened by failed past
Despair's floating, Suffering has no ending
My Angel again is fleeing
I can't do anything but to pretend, deep inside
I am Dying and like always myself is on hiding...