Attention Poem by Jessica Anonymous

I want for you to notice me
And that is why I bleed.
I want for you to be with me
but I cannot succeed.

Sometimes you scare away the pain
you even sometimes make it worse.
I would like for there to be a better way
to hide it. But only cutting, really works.

'Oh, those red stains on my sleeve? '
I told you they were nothing,
but you didnt believe it
you knew that they were something.

You tried to act all big and strong
but it only made it worse,
the little cuts and bruises
got so bad, it made you curse.

'What the hell is wrong with you! ? '
you shouted in my face
when you saw the sleeve of my shirt
was now a crimson lace

This is not what i wanted
this attention is bad.
I just want to go back
to the attention i never had.

Every day you glare at me
you act like i am death.
Then one day i made my mind
...this would be my last breath.

I walked into the kitchen,
found a shiny knife,
I took it to my room
and said my last goodbyes.

I saw my face in the reflection
I looked so sad, but I didnt cry
because all I did, my whole life
was try and try and try.

I tried to grow old.
I tried to live my life.
I tried to be happy.
I tried to be your wife.

You could never love me
I see now that I was stupid
but i dont blame you....
not at all......I blame cupid.

I wish we were more than freinds
then maybe I wouldnt do this.
But I have to do it now
my heart is now an abyss

I bring the knife to my neck,
I watch as the blood runs,
I watch as my shirt turns red,
'it hurts worse than the little ones'.

I start to feel dizzy
and i fall to the floor,
I close my eyes and whisper:
'if only, we were more.....'