During all the years of correspondence I have actually been courting you with every bit of romance available.You (for all the reasons we've discussed)have shared many times, in many ways that being together was not possible.I feel like a damned idiot for not wanting to get your message. My desire to be with you (although real to me)was never going to happen.
At the very least we have been pen pals...and at the most I have been like your older brother. This is far from what I wanted.
Fate has a way of playing tricks on the gullible, no matter what the intentions...
All my hopes and longings to live happily ever after with you have been but a dream with no basis in reality.
"There is no fool, like an old fool"
I apologize for the discomfort you felt from my advances, and for being blind to your hesitation.
You have made it clear that you are exactly where you need to be with Jim and the love you share with him.It seems I have been in denial of the simple fact that you are where you want and need to be.
Nice that you and Jim are both Virgos and so much alike, and with so much in common.So much for my believing that "opposites attract".
I truly am sorry that Jim's health is fading and your time together is slipping by.As you say when he leaves this earth he will join the ones he lost along the way, and when you too leave this earth you can be with him again.
In a way you have freed me of a lifetime of longing for something I would never have. Thank you.
As I wrote years ago "First love doesn't get a second chance"
ROTMS
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
You have made it clear that you are exactly where you need to be with Jim and the love you share with him.It seems I have been in denial of the simple fact that you are where you want and need to be.... Love makes sometimes fool as well as wise Sometimes imperfect as well as perfect .......