Katie Anon

I think of you with a heavy heart
Confused why it has ended like this
Why it has so torn me apart
To destroy someone without a second thought
...

When I think of you I feel gratitude, love and loss
These bring a mix of warmth and pain
They have not lessened year after year
But their intensity causes me fear
...

Was it really abuse?
I mean damage was done
But only behind closed doors
Where no one else saw
...

As my eyes focus and it becomes clear
I feel the emotions so familiar
Sadness, shame disgust and hopelessness
Form a knot in my chest
...

I wish I could overcome my demons
I wish I didn't get so sad
I wish I knew the key
To unlock the potential within me
...

Who ate all the food
Fatty little you
Fat fat fat
You need to loose a few
...

There is power in silence
But it can open deep wounds
Built by everything unsaid
Toxicity is always fed
...

Life is like a board game
Which I do not want to play again
Everyone else seems to get it
But it does not interest me one bit
...

There is a spark of hope that is now here
But why does it fill me with such fear
It is just a small flame struggling to stay alight
But this slight warmth causes a massive internal fight
...

My heart aches when I think of you
To feel safe in your loving arms
For you to hold me close
This is what I want the most
...

The world has shrunk to nothing
A happy future I cannot see how
Each day survived but not lived
Without hope life can only be now
...

My whole body years for true love from another
The safety, the truth, and the connection of souls
For somebody to see it all and to accept, even value it
Without love I feel like my life is missing a vital bit
...

When I say I'm OK when my heart disagrees
Each time my smile hides the hurt
Or when my wants I do not assert
...

I know why caged birds still sing
Even without the feel of the wind
Trapped within a home of solid bars
Without view of sky, sun or stars
...

Sun setting in the sky
Is the day's way of saying goodbye
As the moon grows bright
It is welcoming in the night
...

Your story is your own to write
Each moment adding to the plot
You can control your character
But so many other things you can not
...

You say to just let down the walls around

They are what keep you trapped in the dark
...

You are the source of much conflict and fear

The voice that whispers in my ear
...

What is it that makes me want to avoid this world?
Escape into a world of nothingness
Or to hurt myself so much for just a moment of pleasure
Why are these thing I seem to treasure?
...

I write to you diamonds in the sky

For they say you will grant each a wish
...