April DOWN

Is my smile wide enough?
Can it impress my personality onto you
Even though it may be suppressed
...

To plan is such a rough guideline
Time and possibility will batter the flow
I betroth to the uncertain signs
That will steer me onto the crow
...

My vocal chords are raw
As I called for you in song
The weakened voice my flaw
Perhaps all along I was wrong
...

My tombstone and yours
Now becomes virtual

Offerings of reflection
...

They reside in the corners
Form of a man black with a grey residue
They seem to watch and gather Intel
That's my only assumption
...

In an instant, less than a moment
The decision is made
Before I even recall acknowledgement
...

To function in this society
Is problematic
The legal excuses defeat me
The law so manipulated
...

Society you depicted my show
To fit into these categories
Unrealistic expectations bending me low
Till I ended locked in a repository
...

As I hide with the cobwebs
The spiders aimlessly clambering
I watch the smoke coil from my cigarette
My lungs full and the ash falls
...

Up the walls at a perfected velocity
Under my skin at times
Forever tangled in the strands of my hair
Down my fingertips to the table
...

I had no home
I stared years through windows
Snippets of life to learn
Street lamps my comfort as I roamed
...

Burden me, for I know I crack your back
My "quirks" discovered as a fatalistic personality
I'm snapping too, my spine is bent
I'm a hunchback soul, it's stability I lack
...

It's the slight manipulation
That concerns me
The doubt and trepidation
That will then consume me
...

Am I dust?
Spreading along a howling wind
Stuck in the slipstream
Boundlessly never-ending cycle
...

I am cold… or perhaps warm.
I can no longer acknowledge,
My bodily functions
...

I am becoming with such fragility
Withering like the leaves
My seasons rapidly cycling
The hardest option is to breathe
...

In the shadows I lay
Curtains drawn in dust
The Lifelines beginning to fray
Into the jowls of incessant dusk
...

The ghost of myself
Is housed in this man
I follow with fanatical loyalty
Imbedded with hope so I ran
...

The darkness all encompassing
I feel it sting the whites of my eyes
Vitality formed and I'm on fire
The demons better know my nature
...

The places in inhabit
Get darker year by year
Soon the sun closes to me
I am left in a vacuum with my fear
...